Monday 20 August 2012

What is Right, and What is Wrong?

On a train journey home after an evening in London, I fell (as one does) to contemplating morality. What is right, I asked myself, and what is wrong? And I conceived several answers to these questions, from differing viewpoints, and all in rhyme. So here they are.
(1)  The Autocrat
What is right, and what is wrong?
Might is right. Bow down, O throng!
What I tell you, you’ll obey.
If not, you’ll get put away.

(2)  The American conservative
What is right, and what is wrong?
GAHD is right, and he’s so strong,
If ya disbelieve GAHD made ya,
U.S. troops will come invade ya.

(3)  The Academic Philosopher
What is right, and what is wrong?
I am right, and you are wrong.
I’m the one who gets the laurels,
‘Cos I always win the quarrels.

(4)  The Tippling Philosopher
What is right, and what is wrong?
Oh, that’s difficult and long.
Now I’ve told you, I do think
I will have another drink.

Cheers!

(5)  The Climate Alarmist
What is right, and what is wrong?
We’re all DOOMED! Just hear that gong!
Gotta stop that GHG!
But, of course, you’ll pay, not me.

(6)  The Moral Relativist
What is right, and what is wrong?
What is scent, and what is pong?
I will say – not being two-faced –
Right and wrong are merely taste.

(7)  The Politician
What is right, and what is wrong?
Vote for me! Ker-chink! Ding-dong!
I’ll thank you, then I’ll legislate
What’s bad for you, good for the state.

(8)  The Australian
What is right, and what is wrong?
Right means a full billabong.
G’day, I’m Bruce, and I’ve no doubt,
Right is floods, mate - wrong is drought.

(9)  The Confused
What is right, and what is wrong?
Is wrong right, or is right wrong?
One’s good, one’s bad, that’s plain as day,
But which is which, I cannot say.

(10)                  The Writer
What is right, and what is wrong?
Are my rites too short, too long?
Maybe this wright will make more money
If he writes verses deep and funny?